Saturday, September 12, 2009

It Only Hurts When I Pee/Walk/Stand-up

Damn. I think I have a bladder infection. Frequency and burning, some cramps. No recent sexual activity (with other humans present). Maybe there's an old kidney stone that's holding on to some bacteria. Who knows where these Job-like afflictions come from? Jehovah, some might say.

Yes, yes, I am drinking copious acidic drinks to neutralize the bugs, thanks.

And very tired. Very. Tired. Droopy-limbed and clumsy. Napping all the time.

Though that sense of complete exhaustion could be due to the a) the meds (took a double dose of Lyrica this morning as I forgot my morning meds yesterday), or b) to the burst of swimming and aqua-walking I performed yesterday, or c) to the staying up late and imbibing copious alcoholic drinks at what might shape up to be Our Local because of its centrality to the apartments of many expat buddies, the little pub on the Goldhill Building, Molesto's or something.


Speaking of my meds for peripheral neuralgia, I'm wondering when the time will come that walking is so painful that I'll need one of these...

Once more last week (after talking to sympathetic friends at the conference), I scanned my feet in our office to look for signs of tarsal tunnel syndrome (like carpal tunnel syndrome, but in the feet, obviously), but everything looked fine; nice, un-swollen nerves, not obviously pinched or inflamed. My neurologist thinks it is small nerve damage anyway, not TTS, so the possibility of more surgery is currently receding. But the immanent possibility of the pain receding does not. Ironically the only drug that did work for me was Cymbalta but that drug GAVE me prostatitis/bladder infection-like symptoms, similar to what I am experiencing today. [Thinks: maybe today's problem IS the Lyrica dose, as it is roughly similar in effect.]

There are days I feel that the maybe the pain in my feet and toes is imaginary. It must be impossible for someone to be so negatively AWARE of his/her feet 24hrs a day, for the pain to still be lingering after six years. I begin to feel that I am whinging for nothing, that this is not special, that everybody suffers from sore feet (look at the ads for inner-sole inserts everywhere).

But when I find myself stopping for a moment to wipe away the tears and to relax my aching facial grimace, when I find myself heading for the travelators and standing still rather than using them as the launch-pad for luggage pick-up as designed, when I see my weight escalating due to living in a completely too-shagged-to-exercise-zone and the fact that two of my drugs are appetite boosters, I have to keep searching for something like relief, something like a cure.

(At least current combination of meds do stop the ultra-sensitive toes problem - those unexpected shooting/burning/itching pains, the pulse of agony that a tickling feather or a light bed-sheet used to elicit - that has pretty much gone, except for when I forget my to take meds!)

Being dopey, obese, tired and hungry, and STILL having much of the pain continuously is a walking nightmare.


p.s: Need toilet paper, must get my electric chair revved up to go shopping.

p.p.s: Yes, I know, loose weight you fat bastard. Ironically, I think it was the increased activities (mainly walking on a treadmill in air-cushioned shoes) I made in 2004/2005 prior to my 30th school-reunion in order to loose weight so I could fit into some older, more stylish clothes that triggered the current continuous episode. I lost 5kgs - and my feet were STILL terrible - but I have put on 15kgs since then. The scales read 129.9kgs this morning. The dreaded yo-yo diet syndrome. And lately, having a social life means eating and drinking out a lot more...

p.p.p.s: Sigh.


savannah said...

bless your heart, sugar! xoxox

p.s. seriously, i do hope you find some relief! right now, i'm also going through my own sort of yo-yo weight gain and until oct. 2 (when i see another doctor), there's not much i can do, except try and moderate some of my behaviors. *sigh* (i'll still be raising a glass in your honor tonight.)

Dick Headley said...

I never know what to say when you do this. Witty quips seem so inadequate somehow.

expat@large said...

Sav: thanks. At least I can use this illness to skip a BBQ last night and a German beerhall today. Might be a start on the road/

Dick: me neither. Sorry, I hadn't really intended for this be a whinge post, but these things happen. That damned old GoBS again. Just nod and move one, car-wreckage, doesn't involve you.

Wow tough night, up about 30times to pee, shivers and shakes, weird half-dreams. Those bladder spasms are something no-one should have to go through - they shoot through your entire body with a white noise of muscle cramps and leave your fingertips on fire. Absolutely no energy.

Yesterday I did go out to get some groceries - bad move, didn't make it to the toilet when I was taking the bags up from the taxi... Just a few 20c pieces (20c is a large coin in Australia) on the trouser fronts, enough to be embarrassing.

expat@large said...

I am seriously thinking it has happened because I haven't been flushing the tubes of late... Infection can grow in the prostate fluid due to stasis, maybe.

Stephen Folan said...

Jesus, sorry to hear this. I had a bladder infection once and thought I was going to burst it felt so bad.

Someone passed me on a Segway when I was Orchard Road. Maybe take one for a test drive.

The weight thing is tricky. Too much and you screw up your joints, not enough and my blood pressure goes through the roof. After this week I will turn my weak, addictive personality towards the gym again and hit the cross-trainer. Seems to be low impact for me compared to the other instruments of torture.

Unknown said...
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Unknown said...

I am mid 30s, run and work out a few times a week, not overweight (although most of the exercise is to keep the start of a belly in check). However I still get those type of a weird nights sometimes, not restful sleep feeling shagged the next day (perhaps partly due to being shagged through the night before the following day?).

Anyway, sometimes things are not totally inter-related. Happiness is elusive some times, even when you are not depressive, and life is grand.

My tip would be a trip to one of the neighbouring countries to pick up a belly bug, they are usually great at knocking 30% off your total body mass off in a short time. When I missed you in Singapore last January I was about 20% lighter than when I arrived in my previous port, Saigon...

expat@large said...

H-G - Segway, lol! I tried one Hua Hin a few years back, kept going in circles...

Scott: Only been really ill in Asia twice - once was from water in Chennai, the other time was a Nasi Padang place opposite Bugis St in Singapore. I had a friend who got amoebic abscesses in her liver from Bali, she lost a HEAP of weight. Oh, another friend was hospitalised after eating bad McDonalds here in Singapore too.

Unknown said...

So when are YOU going to get into the local weight loss trend then? Bad McDonalds, is there anything else?

Re the Segway, Dad the never say die semi retired engineer is going to be making one for me soon, he got plans from the latest edition of one of the local electronic mags he reads. It's such a great big boy's toy concept I had to put up the cash to make it happen, I couldn't help myself!

DanPloy said...

Have fun!

Paula said...
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Lost in Melbourne said...

Stay off the grog for a while to help shed a few pounds, it certainly works for me.

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